Do you ever wonder what it is you are meant to do with your life and if you are doing what it is you are supposed to be doing?
I watched an episode of The Middle this week and Mrs. Frankie Heck, the sometimes cranky, often disorganized, and kind of nutty mother has a moment of realization while visiting a new church. A flamboyant preacher speaks about counseling a man on his death bed how he asked the dying man if he got his business done. He turns his attention to Frankie and asks if she is getting her business done.
Frankie is so overwhelmed and inspired by the sermon that she becomes obsessed with getting her business done. The only problem is she has no idea what her business is. She thinks it might be beading bracelets; then she decides it’s assembling first aid kits for soldiers; and then she believes her calling is to design some sort of shelter for homeless pets, orphans, and old people where they can all live together. Her husband suggests she folds the laundry that is sitting on the kitchen counter but that is not meaningful enough for her.
She ends up feeling deflated and unnecessary as if there is no meaning to her existence. She totally stresses herself out trying to figure out what her business is. In the end she realizes her business is taking care of her family, getting them from place to place, listening to them, providing for them, and having some quiet relaxing time every Sunday at her normal place of worship.
I had to laugh at this episode because I could completely relate to Frankie’s quest to find meaning. I often have moments when I wonder what it is I’m actually doing with my days. Sometimes I feel I should be doing more, making some kind of a difference. I wonder what it is I’m meant to do or be.
Shouldn’t I know what I want to be when I grow up since I’m grown up already?
I spent many years as a stay at home mom. Now, I work part time in a school and I write this column. I cook, clean, run the kids from place to place, shop, help with homework, and try to find time for my husband and friends. I just wonder if it’s enough. Should I have more goals? Should I be working 9 to 5 again? Is there more I could be doing? Am I getting my business done? What is my business anyway?
I really don’t know. I was not one of those kids who had a plan or a set dream of how I wanted my life to turn out. There were times I dreamt of being a busy executive, dressing in nice suits, and making a lot of money. There were other times I thought I’d be a teacher and enjoy nurturing young minds and having summers off to spend with my own kids. Then there were moments I thought I’d be an actress or singer or a bestselling author of romance novels.
I didn’t do any of those things but…
I could have continued on my original career path and become a busy executive but I really wanted to be home with my girls.
I never became a teacher but I do work with kids now.
I sang at a friend’s wedding once but was too nervous to ever do it again.
I do enjoy writing this column even though it’s not a bestselling novel.
I guess I’m doing what I was meant to do. My business is getting done while I’m living my life day by day. Sometimes what we’re supposed to do or be happens to us while we’re busy taking care of our business.
About this column: Janet, a Cinnaminson resident who’s married with twin girls, is all around town and writing about it.
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